Happy Fourth of July! This day is a high-point of summer—reflecting on the birth of our great nation, celebrating our freedom, relaxing with friends and family, and capping off the day by watching incredible displays of fireworks. To add to your fun, after gleaning the internet, I have come up with a list of Fourth of July jokes for you to share (at your own risk) with those people with whom you are celebrating today.
- Why aren’t there any “knock-knock” jokes about America?
Because freedom rings.
- What did one flag say to the other?
Nothing. It just waved.
- Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
On the bottom.
- What did King George think of the colonists?
He thought they were revolting.
- Do they have a 4th of July in England?
Yes, that’s how they get from the 3rd to the 5th.
- Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
Yeah, it cracked me up.
- Who was the biggest jokester in George Washington’s army?
- What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1772?
The Boston Flea Party.
- Which colonists told the most jokes?
- What did the American colonists wear to the Boston Tea Party?
- Why was hunting eagles banned in America?
Because it was ill-eagle.
- What happened after the Stamp Act was signed?
The Americans licked the British.
- What is the smartest state in America?
Alabama. It has 4 A’s and 1 B.
- What kind of tea did the colonists thirst for?
- What did one firecracker say to the other?
My pop’s bigger than your pop.
- What was the most popular dance in 1776?
- What was the patriot’s favorite food in the Revolutionary War?
- Which is the highest rated flag in the world?
The American flag. It has fifty stars.
- How much does freedom weight?
- If you crossed a Patriot with a curly-haired dog, what would you get?
A Yankee Poodle.
Just remember, before you groan too much over these corny jokes, our forefathers wrote freedom of speech into the Constitution.